Chapter 3 - The Sandbakelse and Krumkake Chronicles

Adults yet still kids, possessors of keys and cars with the right to drive, drink, smoke, vote, and buy boats. I thought when I reached adulthood, everyone I met would be real adults. People who used logic to form opinions were fair in their conclusions and treated each other like, well, adults but upon arriving I have come to realize too many of the adults here, walking around, are just big kids, with bigger toys. It doesn’t matter which side of the political aisle, where on the economic ladder, which church they go to, or if they go to church at all.

When I was a youngster not even yet dreaming of adulthood, I would hear about the making of and then had the opportunity to taste two of the great wonders of earthly baking. Sandbakelse and the Krumkake. These are wondrous Scandinavian concoctions to be sure.

To make Sandbakelse you mix flour, ground almond, butter, eggs, sugar, and almond extract which are then put on a grill that looks, a bit like a waffle iron without the waffle holes. Once out of the iron the heated dough is rolled on an uneven roller and then sugared. A wonderful delicious crunchy treat is just moments away. For Krumkake you mix flour, butter, eggs, sugar, and cream then press into handy dandy little cupcake looking molds and toss into the four-hundred-degree oven until done. Another delicious, tasty delight that will send your taste buds dancing as if preparing to meet the universal God herself. And to imagine these two magnificent wonders are created using simple materials such as eggs, butter, and sugar – Could this not be compared to the first nine months of life itself? Not a lot can go wrong but you must be mindful to ensure you do everything right, and in the correct order too. After cracking shells, sifting flour, softening butter and the like comes the pressing and baking stage. Here is where much care must be taken to ensure a proper outcome. Heaven forbid you crack or crumble these tiny delights when moving them onto the tray to cool. The wary cooks while looking around mischievously as if to see if there will be any witnesses will whisper to themselves, “Dare I taste a morsel whilst it remains warm?” Well, yes you may. You are an adult!

I feel some of these adults that I know find myself walking around with are a bit like the Sandbakelse or Krumkake that didn’t come out quite right. They are treated and rolled and baked just like all the other Sandbakelse and Krumkake but for some reason beyond understanding they just don’t turn out like the others. Initially, all the correct ingredients, measured correctly are mixed appropriately so they look like the other Krumkake or Sandbakelse but upon being placed on the serving plate, which will be put forth to the public, one last examination is required and upon closer scrutiny, one can see that there are flaws, some are cracked. You certainly cannot go out in public with Krumkake like that. So maybe like we do with Krumkaka we just put them aside. They taste okay, and they are fine just in the family, but you just don’t want to present them in public.

It is a bit odd perhaps to compare broken or cracked Scandinavian baked goods with adults who didn’t quite come out right, but I didn’t want to compare them to sour milk or spoiled cod. That would be gauche. Do you think maybe the grown-up that came out all tasty and worthy of taking out in public should take these crazy, cracked inferiors by the hand, or by the ear, and show them how mature grown-ups handle the situations and challenges that have confounded them still years after passing through the hallowed gates of adulthood?

When I was very young, I assumed that as people’s bodies got bigger and stronger so too would their minds and their ability to grow in understanding the world around them. I really did. I would witness adults doing things I thought strange, odd, and sometimes even cruel. I just assumed when I grew up, I’d understand, and these things wouldn’t seem strange, odd, and cruel. Well, I was wrong. Wow, was I wrong! Unfortunately, too many of the school yard tattle tails, cheaters, criers, and liars grew up to tattle tails, cheaters, criers, and liars however now they have the right to drink, drive, and vote. And sadly, some of these folks are making decisions that affect the rest of the adult’s lives.

I always assumed that as we grew, we would all come to a place of understanding the world and be able to work out ways to move through the world by being more open-minded. That even the jerks, jokers, and whiners on the playground would figure it out. To come to hold a mature-mindedness fifth grade from where such things as compassion, empathy, and sympathy would grow. Instead, too many of our fourth and fifth-grade classmates have remained childish, insensitive, thoughtless, bigoted, and spiteful.

While walking around in adulthood I’ve bumped into greed, fear, and anger. These triplets can be great motivators for playground bullies, and babies and whiners and criers, the lunch money thieves and the kids that didn’t get to be first in line for lunch. Be aware, however, that there is no doubt, that our playground pouters have supped a poison as infectious as influenza, HIV, and tuberculosis. We are all at risk.

We see these asymptomatic carriers every day. They are all around us and appear almost like us. These folks have infected our media and politics have achieved positions of power and influence in our boardrooms and courtrooms. The scary thing about mass infection is that once unleashed they are often extremely difficult to contain. However, history shows these things can be defeated if we coordinate, observe, and isolate. Just remember the lessons taught to us at an early age by the adults in our lives. The Sandbakelse and Krumkake chronicles.

And we see these cracked or over done baked goods all over, everywhere. Everywhere.